Thursday, January 15, 2009

Why are wannabe-jihadis so thick? It's the Juice, innit?

I've already had a pop at wannabee-jihadis' spelling. Malcolm at Cally's Kitchen points out that grammar and spelling are maybe not top of the list of hot topics at yer average madrassa (that would be (1) An in-depth analysis of the Protocols of the Elders of Zion; (2) the chemical and physical properties of chapati flour and hydrogen peroxide; (3) the life of Mohammed with a particular de-emphasis on the age of his favourite wife; (4) Home video making; (5) More Elders of Zion stuff, etc., etc.)

Rod Liddle at the Speccie went further by pointing out that most jihadis are incredibly thick. I suspect (or maybe that should be, hope) that the suave officers of the security services, the men and women of Special Branch and the rugged and sometimes rough members of HM Forces are quite good at thwarting the jihadis. They are probably helped by the fact that, thankfully, most jihadis are halfwits (Have we ever faced an enemy more stupid than Muslim terrorists?):

‘Don’t mess with the Muslims’ was the vainglorious coda to the bloodthirsty video message recorded by the quarterwit Tanvir Hussain shortly before he was arrested for his part in planning to detonate explosives on board an aeroplane, all of which you may have read about in your newspapers this last week. ‘Why ever not, Tanvir?’ we might have asked him gently. ‘Because, let’s face it, you’re absolutely f***ing useless at this Western-infidel cockroach carnage business. You couldn’t blow up a balloon. Mess with you? Mess with you? What would be the point?’

There had been plenty of wholly spastic Muslim terror operations even before those doctors tried to blow up Glasgow airport last year and ended up setting themselves on fire, harming absolutely nobody except themselves, and having the s**t kicked out of them by itinerant security guards. These were the docs, remember, who couldn’t find a good place to park: Allah’s will thwarted by local council parking regulations. (Well, sure, thinking about it, maybe we’re all with Allah and his soldiers on this one.) I was already worried, before then, about the average IQ level of al-Qa’eda operatives; that stuff, though, made me seriously question the calibre of candidates they’re allowing to practise medicine in this country. I don’t mind that my local GP is a psychopathic jihadi, but I would like him to have an IQ level higher than my cholesterol count; he should at least be able to park.

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Anonymous Anonymous said...

I love this blog.

5:26 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I think you’ll find, Paulinus, that this ‘juice’ thing is a bit of a convention, and not the error of a thick jihadi. See here, for example:

See also comments number 3 and 4 to this post, in which the author, himself a Jew (as far as I understand) mockingly uses the word:


11:22 PM  
Blogger Paulinus said...

Yes, I realise he's avoiding getting arrested for inciting racial haterd but I can't resist lame jokes.

12:27 AM  

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