Tuesday, November 14, 2006

Busy Broadcasting Crap



Maybe I should just get rid of the telly. It would do my sanity good. I don't watch much telly as it is but the BBC is really getting on my nerves. I avoid the Today programme on Radio 4 because it's run by a bunch of PC curmudgeons with a variety of axes to grind. I thought drama might be immune from the metropolitan, anti-Christian bias of a corporation largely unrepresentative in its makeup and output of the people it is meant to serve. The BBC recently held a secret seminar in which they 'fessed up to their bias. Lucky for us it leaked out. There are two major culprits:

Spooks. An exciting drama about how MI5 might protect us from the attentions of those who would violently attack our way of life. men and women on guard against terrorism:

That would be Islamist terrorism, right?....err... no... that would be..Mossad agents impersonating Islamist terrorists. Happens all the time.

OK, but later there would be a few Islamist terrorists, right?....err... no... that would be...Christian terrorists (though living in a place called St Dominic's - you see who they're really after) egged on by an Anglican "bishop"...yeah, right.

How about the last episode - a few Islamist terrorists, right?....err... no... that would be...mad environmentalists intent on flooding central London at high tide.....but only because the British government had plans to take advantage of the death of 2 billion people through global warming. Riiiiiiiiiiight....

Meanwhile, back in the real world the real MI5 are monitoring 1600 Islamists with 30 'spectaculars' waiting to happen. Glad they're not like the MI5 on Spooks

OK Robin Hood - you can't fanny about with that, can you? Well yes, you can. I think the rot set in with Kevin Costner bringing a Mohammedan back with him - even if it was Morgan Freeman.

But the new BBC one. Let's make it simple:

Robin comes back from the Middle East, discontent with fighting a Holy War- see where we are going?

He's learnt the Koran - just so he could understand the enemy, you understand.

Maid Marion - now merely Marion as Ebomaniac points out - is a strong woman in her own right...see where we are going?

Then there's Mutch the Miller's son - as camp as a row of pink chiffon tents.

Finally, get this, they free a bunch of Muslim slaves (there were so many of them, you see) and one of them joins the Merrie Men. Only it's a she, called Jack Djaq -short haired and sassy, fluent in English - just like all those 12th century Muslim women were. Of course.

Nottinghamshire - completely empty of churches and clergy. At a funeral -no priest in sight - the body laid out on the steps of the castle with the Sheriff giving the oration - like Four Weddings and a Funeral but with Keith Allen and no Auden.

And Friar Tuck...superfluous to the BBC....he presses all the wrong buttons: a man of the cloth who is circumferentially challenged and might be a figure of fun.....

Pass the sick bag, Alice...

4 Comments:

Anonymous Galatian said...

A most amusing piece. Actually, I am surprised that Friar Tuck was not included in Robin Hood: with his fondness for the table and the tavern and his surprising ability at fisticuffs he would have made the perfect vehicle for a malign caricature of a Christian.

2:04 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

We got rid of our TV back in 1995.

It was one of the BEST things we ever did for our family.

Here is blog on the subject:

http://scorpionstalkingduck.blogspot.com/2006/07/our-special-independence-day-message.html

God Bless

5:09 PM  
Blogger Bill Sticker said...

Robin Hood with a SARACEN short recurve bow and not a historically authentic LONGBOW? I watched five minutes of the preening PC nonsense before switching off and going to take my dog for a walk.

It's almost like the Ministry of Truth wants to deconstruct all British heroes.

Regards

Bill

8:04 AM  
Blogger Boeciana said...

Well, to be fair, if it's the late twelfth century, there shouldn't be any friars about. Not that historical accuracy is exactly the watchword of Robin Hood (in any of his incarnations, including the fifteenth century ones)!

4:52 PM  

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