Wednesday, September 06, 2006

The Rocky Horror Rite of Consecration of a Creative Liturgy Space



from Dissent is good! The St Joan of Arc Creative Liturgy Resource


The womynpriest (for it is she): In the Name of the She-God, the Good Bloke and the Heavenly Flame.

People (of God): Amen. (or it could be “Yo” or “Right on, sister!” or “Nice rainbow stole, by the way”)

The womynpriest: Hullo! And welcome to St Julian the Apostate’s newly ordered liturgical space. Now for our opening hymn: Bind Us As One

Refrain:
Bind us as one, Diety,
bind us together with cords
that cannot be broken.(lalalaaaahh!)
Bind us as one, Diety,
bind us together,
bind us together with love.

We are a family of chums,
We’re full of Modernist hope,
We don’t like Latin and incense,
We’d like a woman as Pope. (Na!Na!Na!Na!Naaaaaaaahh!)

Let us pray: Ultimate Ground Of Our Being, bless us as, in the spirit of Blessed Thomas Cromwell, we put on the bonfire any unpleasant reminders of our patriarchal past: Missals with their really quite unacceptable rubrics; Chasubles (especially fiddlebacks); thuribles (we have nice ethnic burners now, thank you very much!!); aspergillums; copes (we can cope very well, so long as we have trained counsellors); bells (Daphne brought back a lovely Buddhist gong from Vietnam, so we’ll use that for our Zen Mass) and fixed altars (a symbol of an immovable patriarchy)

Helpers from the community will carry out all the OLD liturgical junk and dump it on the bonfire to much rejoicing and spontaneous liturgical dancing. A chant may be sung such as:

“Out with the old, in with the new
‘Cos you know that that’s just what Jesus would do!”


Blessing of the Liturgical Space:

Deaconess (for it is she): Sisters and brothers – think positive thoughts about the new objects we have purchased so reasonably from Tradecraft:

People: Indeedy-doody, we will.

Deaconess: This multicoloured cloth symbolises that people of many colours and hues are part of this here Faith Community black people, brown people, gay people, the marginalised and the oppressed. We even have a few middle class white people, such as myself and, er, most (sorry, that should be all) of the other people here. Still we’re very open, and that’s the most important thing, isn’t it?
People: Ommmmmm – positive thoughts, positive thoughts

This ethnic handcrafted cup and saucer (or may, grudgingly, say chalice and paten) is a sign of our solidarity with all the poor workers of the earth.
People: Ommmmmm – positive thoughts, positive thoughts

These multicoloured candles (thanks so much for making them Phoebe) are a sign of light in a dark patriarchal world and so much more jolly than those phallic, uniform WHITE ones (if you know what I’m saying)
People: Ommmmmm – positive thoughts, positive thoughts

This abstract sculpture – use your imagination – it could mean anything (and indeed, who am I to impose meaning on anything?)
People: Ommmmmm – positive thoughts, positive thoughts

Finally this here guitar, with which we will play our final worship song: Chaplaincies of London

Have you seen Monsignor
In the closed-down chapel
Kicking up the Ordo,
with his worn out shoes?
In his eyes you see no pride
And held loosely at his side
Yesterday's Tablet telling yesterday's news

So how can you tell me you're lonely,
And say for you that the sun don't shine?
Let me take you by the hand and lead you to the Chaplaincies of London
Creative liturgy will make you change your mind

Deaconess: This liturgical happening is now over – go in peace and have a nice day.

People: Thanks for that, Daphne.

Deaconess: No problemo.

22 Comments:

Blogger Angela Messenger said...

LMAO!!

3:57 AM  
Blogger Joee Blogs said...

Superb! I do love the "for it is she"! you're linked!

6:59 AM  
Blogger Brendan Allen said...

Watch out! The Modern Liturgical Police will try to have you banned!

7:45 PM  
Blogger Katrina said...

Hmm, this image looks very similar to a Chaplaincy that I am familiar with, hmm I wonder if it's the same one!!!

11:09 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

12:18 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Lovingly done is well-advised b wealthier than extravagantly said.

7:39 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Lovingly done is richer reconsider than comfortably said.

11:33 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Lovingly done is better than well said.

3:34 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Well done is richer reconsider than well said.

7:43 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

A the huan race who dares to decay one hour of one of these days has not discovered the value of life.

[url=http://www.berkshirereptiles.co.uk/apps/profile/profilePage?id=53375468]Jenna[/url]


Jane

8:44 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

A man begins cutting his perceptiveness teeth the initially without surcease he bites on holiday more than he can chew.

4:20 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

To be a noble human being is to from a philanthropic of openness to the in the seventh heaven, an gift to trust unsure things beyond your own restrain, that can take you to be shattered in hugely exceptionally circumstances for which you were not to blame. That says something exceedingly important with the get of the honest life: that it is based on a trust in the unpredictable and on a willingness to be exposed; it's based on being more like a shop than like a treasure, something rather fragile, but whose mere item beauty is inseparable from that fragility.

10:52 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Work out ferments the humors, casts them into their proper channels, throws eccentric redundancies, and helps feather in those secretive distributions, without which the solidity cannot subsist in its vigor, nor the typification dissimulate with cheerfulness.

10:46 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

To be a good benign being is to from a kind of openness to the far-out, an ability to trust aleatory things beyond your own pilot, that can take you to be shattered in hugely outermost circumstances pro which you were not to blame. That says something very outstanding about the prerequisite of the honest autobiography: that it is based on a trustworthiness in the fitful and on a willingness to be exposed; it's based on being more like a plant than like a sparkler, something fairly fragile, but whose mere precise handsomeness is inseparable from that fragility.

8:49 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

In everyone's life, at some dated, our inner foment goes out. It is then blow up into enthusiasm beside an contend with with another human being. We should all be indebted for those people who rekindle the inner spirit

5:31 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

In everyone's life, at some time, our inner throw goes out. It is then blow up into zeal beside an encounter with another hominoid being. We should all be glad for those people who rekindle the inner spirit

12:28 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

In everyone's time, at some occasion, our inner foment goes out. It is then burst into enthusiasm beside an contend with with another hominoid being. We should all be glad for the duration of those people who rekindle the inner spirit

1:14 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

In everyone's time, at some time, our inner foment goes out. It is then burst into zeal at hand an encounter with another human being. We should all be indebted recompense those people who rekindle the inner inspiration

2:29 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

In every tom's life, at some time, our inner foment goes out. It is then bust into flame at hand an encounter with another hominoid being. We should all be thankful for the duration of those people who rekindle the inner spirit

4:03 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

In every tom's sustenance, at some pass‚, our inner foment goes out. It is then blow up into enthusiasm at hand an face with another human being. We should all be thankful quest of those people who rekindle the inner transport

12:08 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

In the whole world's time, at some pass‚, our inner foment goes out. It is then break asunder into flame by an face with another magnanimous being. We should all be thankful for those people who rekindle the inner inclination

3:02 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

In everyone's life, at some time, our inner foment goes out. It is then break asunder into zeal by an contend with with another hominoid being. We should all be under obligation recompense those people who rekindle the inner transport

4:07 PM  

<< Home